Chapter 1: Welcome, Sir. Never Been in a Book Before?

Reincarnating in a novel! We’ve all done it before. Including me! So there I was as Commoner 1, practically anonymous, inside a tragic novel that took place in an affluent city. It was perfect. I knew exactly how the story went so all I had to do was buy a house and some land, and make money! Woohoo!

…Not.

As people would say, "the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.” This wretched principle rang just as true in a book as it did in real life.

***

“Are you Daisy Heidi?” the stranger asked. He was a mountainous man with a bulky build. Yet unlike his intimidating facade, his speech and gestures were sharp. As he stood there with his arms crossed tight, another man was on his knees weeping at his feet. This one was familiar.

“Hu, huuu…huuuuung!”

It was Polip. He was the first… not boyfriend but guy friend I met since arriving in this world. The only thing we had in common was that I was Poor Civilian 1 and he was Poor Civilian 2. He also possessed the terrible flaw of being incredibly dim-witted.

“Daisy…! I’m sorry! Huu, huuuung!”

Tears poured out of his eyes as he screamed my name in front of this stranger. It was then that I realized that there was something serious going on here.

“So, you are Daisy Heidi.”

“...No. I am Haisy Deidi.”

“What?”

You’ve got the wrong person.

…was what I really wanted to say, but I just nodded quietly. The three wrinkles on his forehead frightened me. He spoke again.

“Follow me. Duke Henstone is waiting.”

“What?” Who…did you say? My jaw dropped as I stood there, bewildered. Assuming I had not heard it the first time, the man spoke again.

“I said Duke Dane Henstone is waiting for you.” He then glanced at a different direction, from where two more men emerged from the dark.

“What are you doing?!”

The two men grabbed my arms, one from each side. Upon this sight, Polip cried out, “Daisy!”

“Polip! What the…!”

“Don’t worry. He is the most powerful man in the city. There’s no way he would have any business to tend to with people like us.”

“...What?”
“When you meet the duke, will you put in a good word for me? That I-I am not a criminal! No, wait. In fact, you should tell him that I am more than willing to rake the leaves from his yard or clean the stables. Hm?”

I couldn’t believe my ears. Was he seriously saying this to me as I was being captured?! I kicked him in the butt with my leg. I would’ve punched him if my arms weren’t tied behind my back.

“Ack!”

“I will kill you if you ever come near me again!”

“I’ll be waiting for you! Okay, Daisy?”

Such a disgrace. Polip couldn’t shut his mouth until the very end. I couldn’t help but ask while being helplessly dragged away. “Excuse me? How much would it cost to cement someone and then throw them into the ocean?”

“Get in.” Instead of an answer, the man pushed me into the carriage with a smirk. The carriage took off with the clickety-clack of the horses’ hooves. The fear settled in and I shut my eyes tight. Why, you ask? Like Polip had just said, Duke Henstone was a man who was above the clouds and all the birds, the center of all the power in the land, and certainly not a man to have any reason to associate with commoners like us. But there was another reason I was nervous. That man was…the father of the female lead!

***

The duke’s estate was so massive and imposing, it was impossible to fathom its actual size. It felt more like a fortress than a home.

“Is it her?” A deep, cold voice came from the desk.

The man who brought me answered respectfully, “Yes, Your Grace.”

“...”

Then, with a flicker of the Duke’s eye, he removed himself from the room without as much as a squeak. I was on my knees on a carpet so luxurious that it was softer than the blanket on my bed. I did not dare breathe loudly. Ah… such soft carpet, indeed. Is this 100% cashmere? I couldn’t even dream of buying a scarf with this material. How rich was he that he could afford this massive carpet?

“Sit.”

Upon his command, I looked up just to find a luxurious chair with silk embroidery. I stubbornly shook my head. “I’m comfortable here.”

“Is that so? From this moment on, listen closely to what I say and answer only when I ask a question.” He then sat in the chair himself. It seemed the Duke never asked more than once.

“Daisy Heidi. 24 years old. You used to work at Chez Nous Restaurant. Other than that, you have no family and your hometown is unknown…”

“...I still work there.”

“Not anymore.”

“Excuse me…?”

“You’ve just been fired.”

“What?!” What’s going on?! I had worked so hard to get a job at that restaurant. It was an exclusive place where only aristocrats came to dine. “What do you mean fired? The tips there are next level!” Overcome with devastation, I looked up to meet the eyes of Duke Henstone. He was looking down at me as if looking down at a bug. I was barely able to resist the urge to gawk at the sight I was seeing. Gulp.

I had just laid eyes on the father of the female lead for the very first time. He was so young, in his mid-twenties at most! The female lead of this story possessed a beauty that would make anyone turn around for a second glance. True to this, her father had looks just as breathtaking. He was undoubtedly her father. To say that he was handsome was an understatement. There was a chill emanating from those deep, ocean-blue eyes. Not only that. His blonde hair was so bright like it had swallowed the sun that it would probably burn your skin if you brushed against it. His skin was as white as an avalanche that had just poured over. He was basically a walking-and-talking natural disaster. Though he was charming, I couldn’t help but be petrified. He was impressive yet his presence sent a chill up your spine. Overpowered by his charisma, I dropped my head to face the floor. But then, something rolled to my knees.

“Huh…?”

A gold necklace. There was ruby embedded in the pendant of the necklace, and it was surrounded by angels engraved in gold. Its beauty and delicacy were breathtaking. It was the kind of necklace that someone like me wouldn’t have the slightest chance to lay eyes on unless it was up for auction for much cheaper.

“You’ve seen this before.” The threatening sound of the footsteps came closer. He was right. Why was this here…?

“Your stupid friend was caught trying to sell this to a jeweler.”

His voice boomed over my head. It was as if he had read my mind.

“What?”
“The owner of the shop suspected they were stolen goods and reported it. Supposedly the boy said that he urgently needed money to buy his girlfriend a carriage.”

“What, what did you say?!”

“And the person who gave this to that stupid boy was you.”

You, you…! You crazy idiot! Everything made sense now. The reason why Polip was crying so pathetically in front of those scary men. Why I was taken instead of him. And why he said he wasn’t a criminal! I cursed him from the inside with all the terrible words that I had ever known. Some friend he was. He had even lied to me about having no money to move with his sick mother. He had made a fool out of me and my goodwill! I knelt there, grinding my teeth out of fury. But then, the Duke stepped on the necklace, crushing it.

Crrrrunch.

“Oh!” How could he! My chest was pounding yet I could not open my mouth. Though it was a terrible waste, the fact that the Duke could step on it without a flicker of hesitancy was even more terrifying. He asked me a question as I trembled in his presence. “Where did you get this?”

If I gave him the wrong answer, I would be done. This man could skin me alive and quilt me somewhere into his cashmere carpet if he so wished. Besides, there was no reason to lie at this point. I’m sure he had already done an extensive background check. After quickly assessing the situation, I put my hands on my knees and answered politely.

“There was an auction selling off the belongings of the late Madame Maxnaire. I scraped together all the money I had and bought it there.” Was it degrading, you ask? Nope. Not at all!

“Isn’t it odd? You have no hobby in auctions, nor have the time for them.”

“That is…”

“Besides, Madame Maxnaire’s auction was meant exclusively for a small crowd made up of acquaintances. How is it that you were in attendance?”

Duke Henstone sat in front of me with his legs crossed as he flipped through documents. I was right. Those papers were definitely full of information about me. I decided that I would answer thoroughly and truthfully. I would even give him the decimal point of my weight if he asked.

“That, that is…” Ah, whatever. I closed my eyes and yelled, “BecausealthoughMadameMaxnairwasknowntowear justoneolddressherhousewasactuallyfulloftreasuresbecauseshewasabigfatpennypincher!”

The words shot out of me like rapid-fire that I almost forgot to breathe. Whew. Immediately, there was silence.

I was living in Pontipool, a massive city that was very close to the capital. It was also the center of commerce in the empire, which was why various auctions were held rather frequently, even more than one in a single day. They were so frequent that commoners like me would scrape up whatever money they had and head on over on the weekends. Though most of the items were cheap and purchases were made conservatively, there was a bigger reason why auctions were so alluring. Every once in a while, there was an auction filled with items of such value that it would make your head spin with the possibility of turning your life around.

“...How did you come to know of such confidential information?”

After a brief silence, the Duke stood up and came closer to me. My knees touched the tips of his luxurious leather boots. My eyes went from my knees, then to the crushed necklace, and back. The silence was just as crushing on the soul, and if I didn’t give him the right answer, my knees would surely meet the same fate.

I took a deep breath and answered calmly, “I will tell you everything I know, Your Grace.”

“Good. That’s what I like to hear.” He laughed lightly. It was not a joyful laugh, however. It rang through my head for a brief moment, then faded.

I quickly summarized the story that I had read countless times and knew inside and out. “The first chapter is called, ‘All about the World in this Tragic Novel.’ There are a lot of descriptions about the female lead, Pierta Henstone.”

“...What?” There was a deep confusion in his voice. Oh yeah, should I have started with a brief synopsis first?

***

Some time passed. “How is this possible?” He continued to express his shock. “I can’t believe this.”

“Yes, of course you would think that.”

“How are we inside a novel…”

Then, the corners of his lips curled up to create a crooked smile. “How intriguing.” Duke Henstone was surprisingly taking this with some amusement. I, of course, had tried incredibly hard to make everything sound as believable as possible. From secrets that were impossible to know unless you were one of the Duke’s staff, to his own personal memories that even he had forgotten. I had to put all the cards out on the table.

“Please let me know if you want to know anything else!” I did not hesitate to speak for the life of me, even the darkest of secrets. Why, I was ready to push the entire book down his throat. I was happy to death that the father of the female lead actually believed me. Crisis averted. For now.

The Duke rolled his blue eyes in silence, as if in satisfaction of my passionate cooperation. “What is the title of this book?” He was probably asking the simplest question that came to mind. I’m sure his head was so inundated with questions that it was hard to choose which to ask first.

“Oh…” But I couldn’t help but to stay silent. The title was actually a big problem. “Uh, so…” My face turned red hot. The moment I was to say Why Did the Duke’s Daughter Roll Across the Pumpkin Patch? would be the moment I, myself, would be forced to roll over at least 30 times for punishment. I couldn’t believe such an embarrassing title exists. “So, the title…”

The Duke cocked his head to the side at my obvious hesitation.

“Why Did the Duke’s Daughter, Daughter…”

“What?”

I am going to be in so much trouble. I mean, who put such an embarrassing title on this book in the first place? Argh. If I could, I would drive this fist of mine into their face. I gripped my hands tightly into fists and spoke as fast as I could.

“Why Did the Duke’s Daughter Roll Across the Pumpkin Patch?”

“...”

For a while, there was no response. I didn’t have to actually look up to see the grimace on his face. His eyes were surely fiery with contempt.

“I don’t understand.” But the answer he gave after such a long pause was a serious one.

“Pardon?”

“Why would my daughter roll around a dirty pumpkin patch? She has never even been near anything like a farm.”

Sir! That’s not what “roll” means in this context! Who the heck named this book? Come out and show your face! Thanks for ruining my life! I was cursing so feverishly inside that I bit down hard on my lip.

…But hold on a minute. The culprit was here all along. Alright. What’s the point of hiding it anymore?

It was me.